DANCING WITH THE STARS 2009 STYLE

HAS BEENS COME TO LIFE ON DWTS.

Dancing with the Stars has popularized many a B rated or unrated star. Who knew half of these people, let alone would want to watch them dance. Marissa Janet Winokur?? Now there was a star that was constantly on the tip of my tongue!!!

But, looking at how the popularity of many a dying star has been revitalized after this show (witness Drew Lachey and Mario Lopez), I can just hear Tom Bergeron now announcing the 2009 line up:

"Dancing with Maksim Chmerkovskiy is the incomparable Hillary Clinton. You may know her as the former Senator from New York, former First Lady of the United States and now former has been Presidential wannabe. She seems to have a lot of rhythm but she comes in about a beat too late. Let's see how her two left feet can really dance."

"And, not to be outdone by his wife, Former President Bill Clinton will be dancing with two time champion, Cheryl Burke. Make sure he puts his hands in the correct position, Cheryl and don't let him tear your dress. As for Hillary - she'll be watching you."

"Dancing with winner, Julianne Hough, is none other than former Vice President, Dick Cheney, who will be carrying his pacemaker with him at all times. We hear he can only turn to the right. Julianne will have her biggest challenge this year for sure. But, with Julianne's talent and Cheney's ability to manipulate any situation to his advantage, who knows what could happen."


"And, adding a bit of color to the mix, dancing with world champion, Tony Dovolani, is Former Secretary of State, Condoleeza Rice. A real possibility to make it to the finals but probably not win, as Rice dances circles around everyone, but never quite seems to get the point of the dance. Tony is going to have a time keeping her focused on going from start to finish."

Can hardly wait till next season. Oh, maybe John McCain will be a contestant too, then Cheney won't feel so old.

WEEKLY MUSINGS-OBAMA/WRIGHT/SPITZER

Since I wonder if anyone reads this at all, I thought I would post a few thoughts on the latest political uproars.

SPITZER LAND: Let's start with the Eliot Spitzer fiasco. Spitzer made a stupid, stupid mistake paying for his little love toy - and an expensive toy at that (you don't find that at Toys R Us). But, I say, who cares. You got the money, go ahead, get yourself a hot 22 yr old. Just be safe and don't be stupid enough to let your wife and the rest of the Free World find out. You are a public figure, Eliot. You were a muckraker - and a good one. You should have known better than to get yourself in the deep end of the muck pool. But, if every man who ever paid for sex lost his job and faced possible jail time, well, pretty much every married man in the world would be on the unemployment lines. For those of you who don't get that, married men pay and pay and pay and pay - usually right before and after they beg and beg and beg. Now we have the new Governor of New York who has already admitted to having had affairs, not just his, but his wife's too. He pre-empted the press. So, now nobody cares about who he slept with. Hmmm....is there a lesson here? Admit it before they go rummaging through your history and then nobody cares? Seems that way.

Now, on to Obama's speech about his very vocal minister, the right Reverend Wright. This is another WHO CARES. All of a sudden, white people are concerned that a Black preacher may be saying something against the White folk that could make Black people angry. Get Real. African Americans are angry and they should be. White preachers and politicians have been preaching anti Black rhetoric for years - and still do. And, now, because the White man is concerned that some Black minister is preaching about the bad things Whitey has done to Blackie, it becomes news!!! I, for one, think that Reverend Wright is right. There is still plenty of racism. America has institutionalized racism and, if I were Black, I would be plenty pissed too. Where is the surprise? Oh, I get it, you don't want your possible President hearing things like this. It could taint him. What a pity. Get over yourselves Mr. and Mrs. White. Obama was incredibly courageous in even bringing up the subject, let alone giving a major speech on it. Race is an issue. A big issue in this country. I have not been the biggest Obama supporter. But, after this speech, I realize he is a class act and did not throw an old friend under the bus just to satisfy some upset White media folk. He showed loyalty, bravery and leadership. Even with his youth and questionable experience - he showed leadership and dignity. This is what we need, finally, in the White House. We might just have it with Obama.

So, are you reading this? Let me know.
Ms KnowitAll

YOU CAN'T ALWAYS GET WHAT YOU WANT!!

YOU DON’T ALWALYS GET WHAT YOU WANT, BUT YOU DO GET WHAT YOU EXPECT.

By now, most people have heard of The Secret, Positive thinking, affirmations, Oprahizing, and all these Laws of Attraction (clearly I have) to be used to get what you want in life. As a therapist and somebody who looks at these motifs and uses them, there is a big flaw or misunderstanding in all of them. CAUSE THEY DON’T ALWAYS WORK – DO THEY??? OR DO THEY?
Many of my clients ask me why they don’t get what they want when they use all these Laws or methods. They try, they affirm, they believe in the law of attraction, but what they say they want they don’t get.

Let me say that these laws actually can work, but they are too often misunderstood and misused. You do attract what you put out, not what you want. In some cases, these two things may be the same, but not all of the time. What you put out into this Universe is energy. This world runs on energy. Even quantum physics and molecular biology now realize that it is all energy and how we use it that is affecting our world.

If the energy you put out, which is mostly in the form of thoughts, is negative, you will get a negative return. Garbage out, garbage in.

Where do these negative thoughts/energies come from? They don’t come from what you want, which is usually pretty positive,. ‘I want to be rich,’ I want to find my soul mate’, I want to find the perfect job’, etc., etc. There is nothing wrong with that. But that is only a small portion of what is going on. That is, literally off the top of your head. It isn’t what lies beneath.
You are like an iceberg- only 10 percent above the water is seen. You consist mostly of what is underneath the water and not seen until the top portion breaks off and what’s below starts to bob to the surface.

What is underneath the water are your expectations and beliefs. What you really believe and expect is what is being put out by your energy out and what you are going to get back into your life.

So, if you say, “I want to find my soul mate.” But underneath you are believing/expecting – I will never really find anybody. Everyone out there is looking for someone else. Why would they want me. I’ve never found one and never will – then your words mean nothing. In fact, what you will attract and get is what your beliefs and expectations are which is NO SOULMATE. You don’t really deserve him/her. You really aren’t worthy or entitled to have it are you?

Same goes for finding the perfect career or even being happy. If you expect that you will not get the job – you won’t. If you expect to not like the person you are going to meet or have this underlying belief that everyone you are going to work with is not up to your standards or doesn’t know as much as you do or whatever it is you have going on, you will not be happy in your job – even if you can fake your way into it cause you’re desperate. You might get it, but you won’t last, you won’t be happy and guess what, the others around you won’t be too happy with your presence in their environment either.

We all want the perfect external situation to manifest in our lives. We think that the perfect job or mate or all the money will cure our internal ills. Sometimes, our sadness or the situation we find ourselves in can be fixed by more money or a change in circumstances.

This is referred to as situational depression. Situations do affect how we feel and act. We have plenty of evidence that proves that. Just look at Hurricane Katrina victims. And, circumstances, often, change our beliefs and expectations about ourselves and the world. Enough negative occurrences and you begin to believe that only bad things will happen. Have a bunch of crappy jobs one after the other or a few rotten, inconsiderate bosses one after the other and you begin to form an opinion and belief that ALL bosses are like this and that is what is going to happen on the next job. So, why bother looking – you already know what you’re going to get – right. WRONG.
I know someone will write and say, ‘but I always say, this time it will be different –this will be the perfect job for me.’ Well, good for you. And maybe the next time it will be different. But look deep inside – into that 80-90 percent that you do your best to not show the world – but comes out anyway. What is that part of you really saying? Is it saying to you: “Yeah, buddy, you can say that the next one will work for you, but you really know it won’t. Success is just not for you. You don’t deserve it. You don’t have the experience, the knowledge and you don’t even like people – so you really think the next time is going to work (ha, I laugh).” If that is what is really going on underneath your positive statements, the likelihood that things will work for you is pretty remote. (Yes, the opposite happens too.)

We will discuss changing those underlying beliefs and expectations in future columns. Stay tuned. But for now, just notice what is happening in your world. If you are receiving those things you want – look at what you believe really believe and expect underneath it all. You will discover the beliefs you are putting out really do coincide with what is coming back to you.

If you find that what is going on in your life is everything you don’t want, you need to spend some time looking deep inside yourself about what you believe and expect to happen. When the inside changes, the outside changes too. If nothing else, you will feel a lot better about yourself and the world you live in. And isn’t that what you do want.

Please note that there are situations and biological reasons that you may feel as you do and these can be helped. We will address more about this later. Just know that if there is garbage within – there will be garbage without. You can’t control everything, but your reaction to it can be controlled.

Other topics to come:
Listening to that inner voice – your true soul voice.
Acting on what you believe.
Accepting yourself and others
Changing those internal beliefs/expectations.
Do you live in yesterday?
How can I change?
Is what others say about me important? (What others say about you does matter. )
What you eat/drink/smoke does affect how you feel.